On Oct 25, 11:34 am, bmo...@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
wrote:
> Is Denver really a baseball town? I dunno. But here you go...
>
> http://www.nydailynews.com/s****ts/baseball/2007/10/21/2007-10-21_15_t...
>
> 15 tips for Rockies fans
>
> 1. If the Rockies win Game 1, they are not Super Bowl champions.
>
> 2. Nobody pours Gatorade on anybody's head. Watery beer from your
> famous, avaricious brewery is also taboo. Champagne is the preferred
> beverage of baseball celebrations (champagne is a bubbly alcoholic
> drink made from grapes).
>
> 3. There is really no point in wearing orange, since the Broncos are
> not involved.
>
> 4. Don't bother looking for cheerleaders. The closest you're going to
> get is "Dinger," your triceratops mascot. Dinger is like Mr. Met,
> except without the sense of self-parody.
>
> 5. If the Rockies move a runner along the bases, that is a good thing.
> But they only have three outs to score a run, not four downs.
>
> 6. One of you needs to interfere with a ball in play, just when the
> whole series is at stake. It's even better if the guy is a kid.
>
> 7. In case you lose the Series, 15 seasons without a title does not
> qualify as "long-suffering."
>
> 8. Thin air is no excuse for thinking that easy fly balls are going to
> be home runs. Stop getting so excited. Get some depth perception.
> Lasik surgery can help.
>
> 9. Seth Smith is a rookie outfielder on your team, not the backup
> quarterback to Eli Manning. So, feel free to cheer him.
>
> 10. After a grand slam, there is no extra-point conversion.
>
> 11. Even after you win 21 of 22 games, you are not rated No. 1 in the
> BCS poll and the Rockies don't get to play Ohio State in the
> Superdome.
>
> 12. If you win the title, all your good players will soon become
> Yankees, who will then lose in the first round of the playoffs to yet
> another Cinderella team before stealing all their players. We call
> this "revenue sharing."
>
> 13. If a baseball goes into the stands, you are allowed to keep it and
> bring it home to your own private humidor.
>
> 14. If Clint Hurdle loses the World Series, you must second-guess his
> choice of starting rotation and demand his immediate firing.
It's a god-given right. The Rockies of all teams should understand
that. One article I read already had a breakdown of the various
mistakes Hurdle made in game one. God leads them to victory, but the
manager/player is responsible for defeat, a fundamental tenet of faith-
based s****ts idiocy.
> 15. Profanities are a requisite form of heckling. No excuses.
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